Posted in Let's look

Let’s Look

Hello!

Well, as usual, I can’t believe it’s already the second Wednesday of the month. That being said, since this week is spring break, I’m happy that it’s a different kind of Wednesday!

I’m linking up with Shay and Erika for Let’s Look.

So far this year, we’ve looked at…

  • Low level goals for 2025 in January
  • How you work on your marriage in February
  • How you reset for the week on Sunday in March

This month’s topic is…maintaining friendships.

First and foremost, I’m so thankful for my friends. At this point in life, I have work friends, neighbors who are friends, friends from my kids’ activities, “Mom” friends and my truest friends are probably the core group of use whose kids hang out together the most.

I have a “core group” at school and I have a “core group” of friends like the ones we travel with for fall break. These are the same people who I can depend on for carpool, call when I’m worried about something, vent to, have a glass of wine with, play a card game, and so much more.

Occasionally, we’ll get together to play a game or reconnect in the summer at the pool. We stay in touch mostly via text messaging just organizing rides for our kids, sharing sports schedules, planning a time to get together, or bumping into each other at the gym or while out for a walk.

Trav has friends from his childhood and even college who he’s very close with, and they’d do anything for each other. Many of those friends’ wives were my first friends when I moved to Kentucky, and I will always be grateful for their warm welcome when I knew no one after moving here. Sometimes, I wished I’d been able to maintain closer friendships with high school and college friends.

When I moved to Lexington when I did, I barely had a cell phone, and Facebook wasn’t a thing. Then, like what happens in life, you just get busy and time slips away. Also, KC isn’t just a few hours away…it’s nine! So, when I get to KC, it’s usually just for a few days, and I end up spending time with family. I love keeping up with childhood and college friends thanks to social media and texts, so it does feel like we’re connected in that way.

Once the kids hit school age, it was very important for me to be in a neighborhood in which we wouldn’t want to move, would have great schools, be close to whatever we need, and more. I moved when I was in the 7th grade, and it all ended up being ok…but middle school is a hard phase in life to move. I wanted the kids to have the same friends from kindergarten like Trav did, and we moved to this house the year before they started kindergarten.

I know friendships change, but both of my kids have a really solid group of friends, and some of their parents are some of my best friends. I appreciate our “mom gang” group text as well as the smaller group texts too. Right now, the “middle school moms” group text, that isn’t used as often these days, is a buzz with the driving permit info. It’s just nice to know that there are so many awesome people I can turn to if I need anything from a cup of sugar to a car ride for my kids.

In some ways, right now it’s hard to maintain friendships just being busy with all the kids’ activities. That being said, I know true friends will always be there. I still have great friends whose kids don’t go to school with my kids anymore, but we pick up right where we left off when we see each other. I know, in the future, out calendars all won’t be dictated by our kids’ schedules…the day we don’t have to schedule carpool…wow! Hold me! It’s coming in the next year or so.

I’m ready for summer and hanging at the pool and just having a bit more downtime to see friends who we don’t get to see as often as we’d like to. Plans seem to fall into place a bit more naturally in the summer.

Also, I have to admit that since I am an introverted homebody, when I’m home, I want to stay at home. I also know that I need to get out a bit more sometimes, and I will do that too.

I don’t have a secret for maintaining friendships, but I’ve figured out quality over quantity, and that loyalty is the greatest attribute that I look for in a friend…well, that and sarcasm! We can’t take ourselves too seriously!

8 thoughts on “Let’s Look

  1. It’s funny how many of those mom friends I’ve lost as my kids gained their independence and went off to college. I don’t think I’m in contact with all that many friends from high school or college either– and I moved 15 minutes away! Some of my closest high school friends moved away but mostly we just all had kids at different times or found that life took us in different directions. But I do find that I don’t feel like I don’t have any friends; I’m just often making new ones.

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    1. That’s sweet to think of it that way…as making new friends
      I had that same thought as I wrote the post – wonder how friendships will look as our kids go on to college, etc. Many of these great friends live in our neighborhood, so unless someone moves, we are close.

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  2. It’s definitely quality over quantity for me, too. I realized a few years ago that I don’t have to agree with everything my friends believe in or do. I can be a very black and white person. I have been better about just taking them as they are. I have friends that I see about once every two months for happy hour and some of them we also do couple things with but that is really rare. Most of these are just my friends.

    Then, we have my two besties and their husbands and we go out to eat with them about once every other month which is enough for Tom. He loves the guys, but he just doesn’t need to be that social.

    And, my sisters are the ones I talk to the most other than people at work. The work people are the ones you are in the trenches with! Lol.

    It is easy to go to happy hour right after work, but going out in the evening after being home is a rare thing for me! So, I get that.

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    1. It’s so nice that you have your sisters. Built in best friends!
      Yes happy hour is a great option . My school actually organizes one once a month . I’ve gone a couple of times but will be able to go more once kids can drive

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      1. It is. They are great. I wish we lived closer.
        That is so nice. But, when I was at your stage I couldn’t do that much either. I don’t think I could happy hour until my kids started college. So, it’s only been 5 years or so that I am a happy hour queen!

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  3. You are very blessed- you are surrounded by great people because you are a great person- it is challenging as the kids grow- we just drift sometimes because our families are the priority- you have a done a great job, however, maintaining the true friendships!

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    1. I’m grateful for our fall break trip and summers at the pool as ways to know we’ll always hang but we could do better about impromptu things too. When we had all the snow in January, we got together to play cards and that was nice.

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